Remembering What Marriage Is About

I recently had the pleasure of attending my cousin's wedding in Abilene, Kansas. My cousin Donnie (I can't seem to bring myself to call him Don because I've always known him as Donnie) married the love of his life, Shelley. The wedding was nice; nothing out of the ordinary. Besides being an usher, an escort and a candle lighter, I had the opportunity to be a groomsman as well. During the wedding I found myself being distracted by cramps in my back. It has been a long time since I had to stand still for that long and I think my back was trying to tell me to sit down. Anyway, about the time that the exchange of vows started, I really began to resonate with the words that were being said. I thought about the idealistic words that were being spoken between lovers and remembered saying those same kinds of words over five years ago when I got married. In that short time, I was able to reflect on my own marriage and take away a few thoughts that I could use that week in my own marriage.

To make a long story even longer, I found that my participation in someone else's wedding provided a lens for me to examine my own marriage. Reliving that moment of connection with my spouse stirred something in my soul that made me want to recommit those things to my own wife. I think Than's post titled Walking Among the Dead was very insightful. His post exhorts us to ponder our own mortality and sense of being by being in the presence of others who have gone before us. In a similar way, I think those of us that are married should make every effort to attend weddings we are invited to. That experience provides a mechanism to evaluate our own marriages and recommit to the vows that were made. I'm beginning to understand why many couples enjoy a time of vow renewal. I think I would like to pursue something like that in the near future.